“Secretly Yours” Lacks Secret Ingredients for a Good Romance
The romantic interests are supposed to have a "grumpy vs. sunshine" dynamic. Julian, an Ivy League professor home for a sabbatical, is nowhere near grumpy. Once he gets a face full of Hallie's breasts, he is a horny, spontaneous, jealous wreck whenever he's in her presence, constantly hoping to impress her with every little gesture. Hallie, the local self-employed gardener with zero time management skills, is stuck in a state of arrested development. Hard to believe either of these people are supposed to be around 30.
It's billed as a "second-chance romance." But it isn't that. Hallie has had a crush on popular kid Julian since high school and hasn't dated anyone since the stolen kiss they shared before he graduated. Given that Julian was drunk at the time and doesn't remember either the kiss or Hallie, there's not much excitement in their dynamic. We don't even get a flashback scene that shows the kiss - that's how little it matters. The story reads more like an "in-progress first crush" more than anything, complete with Hallie still behaving like an impulsive 16-year-old.
The setting is supposed to be "small town." But it doesn't have the personality of one - no one runs into old teachers, former classmates, or cranky neighbors. Where are the town gossips? No one else remembers Julian from his BMOC days? It would be interesting to hear from another former classmate of Hallie's, maybe one who remembers Julian differently.
The plot is supposed to revolve around secret love letters. Except it doesn't need the letters! Julian starts to fall for Hallie before any letter is written and delivered. The letters themselves have the exact same voice as the third-person narrator: overwritten, ponderous, and full of generalities about love. The "conflict" shows up about 40 pages before the ending, by which time the main characters have already hooked up and started dating.
There's a miscommunication. And it's barely a plot point. Julian has anxiety and fails to immediately explain his (poorly-written) panic attack witnessed by Hallie. She picks this moment to reveal that she's behind the secret love letters and leaves when he's unresponsive. Julian feels betrayed. This is supposed to be the emotional climax, but it's such an afterthought that it barely registers.
Hallie, the FMC we're stuck with. She's horrible! Though a savant at gardening, she's constantly late to appointments and brings her three dogs with her wherever she goes, trusting that they won't dig up the flower beds she's working in. Hallie also hates it when her clients request specific floral arrangements (for their own lawns!) because she is an artiste who uses flowers as her medium. I'd tear my hair out if she was the only gardener in town. I can't believe this story is about competing wineries instead of Hallie's unprofessional behavior ruining her career.
Julian, the MMC we're stuck with. He turns into a possessive alpha male whenever he's alone with Hallie. At one point he claims that Hallie makes him act different than he usually does, which would be okay if he was a more engaging character with and without her. And the way Julian thinks and behaves around his so-called rival (a local gardener pining for Hallie), is more in line with the inner thoughts of a fictional serial killer than the buttoned-up hunk he's supposed to be. Julian's on sabbatical because his colleague had a nervous breakdown and he fears that one day he'll snap as well. It's a fine premise, but ... why not just write it so that Julian experienced an attack and went on sabbatical to recover? That would do more to explain his supposed reluctance to put a move on Hallie. And it wouldn't make me think about serial killers.
The smut is pretty good (whenever the plot goes away). The build-up to it isn't exciting, but when the book is in smut-mode, it ramps up quickly! I would've appreciated it more if Julian didn't have to change into a different character every time they had sex. Where's my defrosting ice prince?
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